What does it mean to treat all people with respect and
dignity – particularly those with intellectual or developmental disabilities(ID/DD)? This is a question those of us who work in the field ask ourselves
often. Not surprisingly, there are often disagreements about what actions and
language show real respect and dignity.
And, do actions undertaken by very good people with the best intentions
actually perpetuate stereotypes of people with ID/DD? Look at the following
video for example:
First, and I
can’t say this strongly enough, I truly admire the motives of the coach,
Mitchell’s teammates and the opposing players. However, I fear this contrived “success” reinforces the
widely held belief that people with disabilities can only achieve success when
it is handed to them and reality is manipulated resulting in a “win” that was
not earned but created.
Consider the
following:
- The coach claimed he was prepared to lose in order to get Mitchell in the game.
- During warm-ups, Mitchell stood outside his teammates and didn’t really participate in drills
- Referees did not call the game when Mitchell entered – they ignored several traveling calls
- The opponents committed an intentional turnover.
Again, the motives of all
players, coaches and referees cannot be questioned. However, the story was more about what was done for him not
what he accomplished.
Now watch this video of a very similar situation:
First, kudos to Dan Patrick for simply stating what
autism is. He did not show pity
toward Jason by claiming he was suffering from or afflicted with autism – he simply
took the opportunity to set up the story and educate the public.
Although this situation was similar to the previous
story it differs in a few very significant ways. First, there was footage of Jason alone in the gym shooting
shot, after shot after shot. When
his time came he clearly had prepared for it.
Also, he clearly had skills. I wish my outside jumper was as pure as Jason’s. He was his team’s high scorer and
clearly earned that honor. He moved up and down the court and was competed on
offense and defense.
However, what was most telling was the reaction of the
family with a son with autism. I
find the following quote by the Mother very telling: “my only hope is that Eric can play
basketball one day…it may only be for two minutes… “ They did not say “I hope someone does this for Eric one
day.
Like most people I have shed a tear or two over these
heartwarming stories of the dramatic basket or teams clearing a lane so a
player with a disability can score a touchdown. It is refreshing that people in today’s world still care
about people that some in society continue to ignore or marginalize.
However, I strongly believe that everyone is born with unique gifts and talents. I fear that if work hard to set up a “fake success” we waste opportunities to identify what gifts that person has that can be nurtured and supported to create real success.
It is a cold reality that many if not most of us will
never achieve our Walter Mitty dreams.
But we are all capable of significant achievement and success leading to
happiness and respect. That success is something we all deserve.True respect and dignity is not always easy to define
but it’s a discussion we need to continue.
Some useful resources on respect and dignity:
